A paranoid illustration, that's what I thought he said, and it even made sense to me at the time. I thought, "My life is a paranoid illustration." I thought, "This life is a paranoid illusion," and prepared myself for the next. I thought something would come of this, but it hasn't yet, and it's looking less like it will. I thought we'd be happy together, but I'm miserable either way, and you're right, we really both just want a bit of fun. Real life comes with real responsibilities, and we don't have to be living it yet, so should we have started? I think I may have started without you, or you've gone in reverse. The frivolity you once abhored is now desired, and I must admit part of me wants it too. I cling to my moral monogamous high ground but I get no respect for it, least of all from you, and I can't figure out what you want, but neither can you.